My usual antics

Sorry I haven't updated in a while. I've been busy chasing my tail, running around in circles, playing in the snow, sneaking onto my parents bed, licking my butt (not on the couch of course) and working on my beautiful houndy aroma. What can I say? It takes a lot to be me.

Anyway, tonight I had a green bean. Mmmmm. I think I like those. It wasn't as good as the pork scraps Mom gave me, but it was nice and crunchy - just the way dog food should be.

Not too much is new around here. I've been sneaking onto the parent's bed whenever I can, regardless of if they're in it or not. I like to scope out the situation first. Then I make my move. I jump up with grace and plant myself firmly by their feet. This usually makes my Mom erupt in laughter while Dad sternly replies: "Baaaxxxter" over and over as I ignore him and look the other way.

Eventually, Dad will shove his feet under my body, which will only aggravate me enough to turn around. More laughter. Finally, Dad will end up winning (jerk) and I'll slink of the bed, just as gracefully as before. Then I wind up in my stupid bed, waiting to be covered. And seriously guys? My bed STINKS. Yeeesh. It smells like a Basset's been festering in there!

So, that's what I've been up to.

Also, I'd like to take a moment to say: "Bad Grandma!" Why am I scolding my jerkface Grandmother? Easy - she doesn't want to see me. Who wouldn't want to see this? My parents are planning a Casino escape for a night (don't even get me started. First off, why can't I go to the Casino? I'm an excellent poker player. Most dogs are, but this isn't a hidden fact or anything. Secondly - that $5 that Mom gambles with could be put to much better use - like dog biscuits. I can't even fathom how many biscuits Dad's $20-$40 could by. Stupid parents and their lack of priorities).

Anyway, I digress. Grandma and her stupid cat don't want me staying during the week. Stupid cat. This is all her fault. I don't understand why Grandma won't let me near that stupid furry feline. I only want to play, but she says I'll give it a heart attack. Personally, I think Grandma's over reacting. I'll just chase her around the apartment a few hundred times. No biggie.

So, feel free to comment and tell my Grandma to take me for the night because 1) I need a bath 2) I want to eat...er...chase a cat. 3) I like sleeping on human beds and Mom and Dad won't let me on theirs.